‘I’ve had a Perfectly Wonderful Evening, But this wasn’t it’ = i
“When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures bristling with prejudice and motivated by pride and vanity.”
Have you ever gone on a date with an ‘i’ guy…
I have and even though you wanna hear about their ‘life story’ (quite honestly I’m sick of telling my life story on a date) you wish they left their ego at home, like honestly the date was like a job interview and let me just say, he didn’t get the job. This all sprung up in the midst of reading the most incredible book ‘how to win friends and influence people’ now I know how offensive that title comes across but it’s more of a metaphor.
This book is about business because at the end of the day every relationship we have is purely based on ‘what YOU can get out of it’ does she bring you laughter? Is she the type of friend who’s up for anything no matter how spontaneous or last minute the plans may be’ or let’s me quite frank no matter how ghastly inappropriate and rude it may be ‘but is he your generous and rich friend who….
pays for anything
he never complains about it’
Yep…your circle of friends is what represents you and that’s only because they bring something to the table. If they don’t they are tossed out like a pile of trash and your loyalty doesn’t go as far as ‘hey how are you’ when really…who cares how they are. They become acquaintances and you will only ever here from them when they want something or in return you need something from them!
The most common word in any conversation is ‘i’ ‘I want this, I have this, I went there, i do this, I hope you liked what I made you, I wish that and I love you’
it’s all about YOU!!!
‘In 500 phone conversations the personal pronoun ‘I’ was used in a phone conversation 3,900 times ‘when you look at a group photograph that your in, which photo do you look at first’
It’s all about me! So why am I saying winning friends and influencing people is about business! Because who’s gonna wanna go into business unless they are invested in! People only are interested in YOU If you bring them something in return, weather it’s new music, or entertainment, or advice! So a way of making people pay attention to what you want is by being more interested in them! Instead of saying ‘wow your in stock, I’d love to be in stock could you help me invest!’ Well no.1 your using I and me in one sentence, he ain’t lifting A finger unless you probably give him sex cause he doesn’t need to help you, his life won’t change if he helps you! U may be grateful but are you really that grateful for his advice and expertise or are you grateful that you got something out of it!
Come on….your in stock now! You don’t give a shit what happens to him now you got what you wanted out of him! This is what you should say, ‘your a stock broker? How interesting, tell me more’ that’s it! Keep your sentences minimalistic and about them, you will learn and get a lot more Out of them through conversation and listening to the advice then trying to ask for their help!
Even 100 years before christ was born a famous Roman poet names publilius Syrus said ‘we are interested in others when they are interested in us’ it travels that far back and it is still the same today!
“To be interesting, be interested.”
Every one deserve The right to have an ego, but an ego towards others is just arrogant. Be proud of what you’ve achieved but keep humble, say I in your head as much as you want but keep your ego to yourself. Listen to the dreams of others to help your dream in the process. We are all a victim to saying I way more then we should so let’s change up the game and make you the centre of attention by Listening!
“Talk to someone about themselves and they’ll listen for hours.”
Love JL xxx